How to avoid killers, rapists, and stalkers on free adult dating sites
Before the Internet became really popular, the image of people who dated online was very different. The terms “geek” “nerd” and “dweeb” were often used to describe people who spent a huge chunk of their time chatting with others on electronic bulleting boards (aka BBS). You pretty much had a very restricted pool of potential dating partners during those days. Back then, the chance of meeting someone who didn’t wear eyeglasses held up by tape or who didn’t wear a pocket protectors was quite slim.
Nowadays, there’s a huge diversity of people looking for dates online. Online dating has become acceptable and the nerd factor, thankfully, is a thing of the past. While the Internet’s popularity increased the number of “normal” people online, this same popularity also increased the number of stalkers, nut cases, and otherwise freaky people you would never want to be associated with. Besides the occasional horror story of people getting murdered by strangers they met through online dating sites, why not just avoid the hassle of having to deal with head cases, right?
How to avoid dating “problematic” people on free dating sites
Luckily, there’re a few easy ways you can protect yourself from psychotic nuts online. These methods are quite easy to do and don’t take much effort
1) Look up their handle on search engines - Every dating site gives nicknames, user names, or “handles” to members. If you feel you’re ready to ask someone out or about to agree to meet someone offline, enter their user name into Google. You’d be surprised what you would find. Many people leave digital “fingerprints” regarding their identities and real personalities through forum accounts, forum posts, tweets, or feedback forms. Check out their username and see if the locations and other pieces of biographic information mentioned by the person using the same username matches your potential date’s information.
Pay attention to their online personality. Do they exhibit “crazy” behavior like death threats, trolling, or otherwise obnoxious behavior? Do they post pornographic pictures or videos online of ex-girlfriends or ex-boyfriends? Are they harassing former friends or lovers online? Do they continuously complain or bitch about former relationships?
If you see any of the “digital fingerprints” above, you may want to cancel your impending dating with that person.
2) Look up their name on search engines and name databases - Name databases like Pipl.com are quite useful in finding personal information online. Google searches also turn up forum posts or blog posts about the person you’re thinking of dating. Use these resources and try to piece together a picture of the person you want to date. Keep in mind this very important rule though: Don’t believe everything you read online. It can easily be the case that the person you are researching is the victim of a nutjob herself/himself. Use common sense when researching people. If the person is in a position of authority, he or she would probably be the subject of “hate” from subordinates who don’t agree with his/her management style. If the person is attractive or wealthy, expect the obligatory “hater” posts from jealous, bitter, or otherwise sad people.
Make sure you keep in mind the folllowing saying: “If you get thrown out of one bar, it’s probably the bar owner’s fault. If you get thrown out of twenty bars, there’s probably something wrong with you.” This saying is particularly applicable to online haters. If the haters share a common relationship—coworkers or sorority sisters or whatever shared organization, you can discount their complaints to a large part. Group think isn’t just restricted to sheep and cattle. However, if your intended date is being “hated on” by differing people from differing groups at differing times, this is definitely a red flag.
3) Look up government databases - Unless your intended date committed a crime when he/she was under 18 years old, all records of crimes and even lawsuits are stored in public records. However, not all are online so your luck in this department might vary from state to state. Also, if the person you met at a free adult dating site is a professional—ie., doctor, lawyer, etc. there are public professional disciplinary records available. State bar associations and medical associations, among other professional boards, require these records be made public to protect the public from malpractice. Check these databases out to see if they have a clean record.
Lawsuit paperwork is also available online. See if your potential date sued someone or was sued. Keep in mind that this type of record is not automatically a bad thing. It totally depends on what they were sued for. Rear ending someone accidentally with no alcohol involved is a very different thing from being sued for battery for slapping someone. Make sure to pay attention to details.
The Internet has made dating much easier. You can now sort for people who share the same interests as you as well as many other factors. Just make sure you don’t become a victim to online stalking. Use our tips above and protect yourself. Happy dating!
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